beauty, sadness and the best of times

23 January, 2025

Toronto, ON

The holidays are through and so much has been integrated. The comedown from a holiday season may not often go as smooth as one had originally hoped for. The dawn of the new year offers much readiness, so much hope, but also many challenges in the face of the daily struggle. As is tradition - we plan ahead and adjust our habits accordingly, to intend on manufacturing a more enhanced version of ourselves to present to the (who?) world. Yet, with all the equipment, applications and motivation tips available, discipline remains absent at the head table when the cannolis finally arrive...

But with great gain, comes lamentable loss. After eighteen fulfilled years of joy, our beloved Himalayan feline crosses the rainbow bridge. Eighteen years of precious memories, not only with the blue-eyed kitten we long ago brought home, but being there while you grew into a completely different person over the span of nearly two decades. Their last breathe feels symbolic.

Meanwhile, on the PNW, newborn J61 enter the Pod, and met with complications, therefore unable to flourish. A mother orca who has suffered loss before, is once again faced with the devastating heartache.

Watching your parents go through a heartbreaking passing of a beloved friend applies much transition, and exposure to the world of numerous generations. Friends & family will gather and speak about the good times, yet, great shock, fear and the importance of connection floods the room.

Locally, our distant memories of youth-filled shenanigans fade, as small businesses feel the wrath of climbing interest rates and are forced to close at an alarming rate. The towns we once scaled are changing ever so rapidly, and it gives us much preparation to hang onto the people, places and things we all love.

Life continues to zip.

Cherish, protect & savour.

...and if you're one of the lucky ones who had the pleasure of experiencing Ontario Place in its prime - Know that I'm with you.

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Look Back In Anger (1959)

A play about angry-young-men. Burton rebelling against life & wife. It's gut-wrenching to watch the way he treats others throughout, but If you're after your dose of kitchen-sink realism with an immense twist, this pans out. Here, the monologues are so theatrical, they stick with you for hours after. The preparation that must have been put into place before shooting, is quite interesting. Performance outstanding, competently crafted, and it's well-written in true form. Sometimes, silence is the best weapon in these instances. The film still has a lot to say in this modern day.

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Sally Rooney's Intermezzo (2024)

When I read Beautiful World, Where Are You, I remember it being at a time in my life when I felt emotionally fulfilled. Enter, Intermezzo - a passionate tale of two brothers coping with their father's loss, struggling to deal with relationships and unspoken feelings. The lack of quotation marks throughout this book allow the reader to fully lock-in and try to keep up, just to be smacked around the bend with frequent, descriptive sex scenes. I often ponder why the dog's gender was never fully revealed? It's a fully, painted portrait of normal characters, unlike many of SR's previous work.

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Devendra Banhart - Shabop Shalom

I often tinkle with the idea that we are not worthy of Banhart's songwriting capabilities. His musical taste is so personal, that you feel like you get a one-way look into his life experiences and emotions through song, and this track specifically bringing you to your magical garden, when you're truly in need of it. A lyrical genius, and I still consider his Amoeba: What's In My Bag episode one of the all time greatest among the series.

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relocate by Catarine Hancock

There was a period of time where this book had spent many months in my travel bag for a number of reasons. It's provided me much insight into the storyline that Hancock has woven, her personal battle with healing, and more importantly, a representation of the way many people have been impacted by similar scenarios. Even if you can't necessarily relate to CH's writing, her vulnerability speaks beautiful volume. For a young writer to spill out their entire soul onto a page for all to witness, is immense bravery. Relocate is a story of new beginnings, but not in the way mainstream media has portrayed them to be so glorified. Don't believe the hype.

annual autumnal chromatic transformation

8 November, 2024

Bonita Springs, FLA

There is immense damage here. When a veteran meteorologist gets choked up on-air while reporting a modern, historic hurricane, it speaks to the climate struggle that we are all in right now. For those who actively fight towards it, and bang your head against the wall for the rest of your life just to make a tiny dent in all this, you're surely heard by those who share the same motivation. Several boats littered in bushes just to be left behind while the owners immediately purchase new crafts. Sorry, did I mention those are from Hurricane IAN? You heard that right. It's pretty uplifting to believe in a Government that supports climate change.

Place a wager on your greed, a wager on your pride. America's for sale via various sports betting sites. For me, I don't quite understand why tell anyone your vote. It's going to make some people happy, and others super angry. Republicans are set in stone, while Democrats have always been a working progress, but doesn't a potential for evolution seem interesting? Maybe that's why a massive number of citizens, clothing companies (Please, stop), and long-time followers endorse this route. In closing, yard signs are allowing good, kind folk to behave unreasonably, and it's never been so entertaining.

I loved returning to this place for many reasons. It holds precious memories of youthful travel. Shaking your piggybank erratically upside down just to afford a churro & a fast pass. The Sunshine State remains alive & well.

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Plastic People (2024)

Having the pleasure of hearing Ziya Tong speak at the most recent Sustainable Production Forum at CBC, this horror documentary quickly became a top priority. I caught a screening at the Elora Gorge Cinema, which I cannot recommend any higher. When a film has an in-person warning prior to start time, it gives the audience something to finally pay attention to, and open up the floor for a post-screening discussion. Scientists everywhere have been studying the impacts of microplastics on the human body, and how damaging they really are, for decades. To visually represent the health effects, declining fertility rates, the methods of washing your clothes for God's sake, and exactly how these compounds really infiltrate our systems is delving into an ever-debatable argument. Spoiler alert* (incase you weren't already aware) - They're everywhere. This flick will (might?) make you rethink the way you purchase plastics, integrate them into your life, recycle them, and how delicate our human bodies really are. Yet, all over there are deniers and non-believers. Won't there forever be? Processing a lot of the information in this doc can be challenging, it's best previewed with a buddy.

Let the fear mongering begin!

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Conor Kerr's Prairie Edge (2024)

A massive recommendation from The Giller Prize longlist. To learn about the Indigenous histories towards a true reconciliation, and the character's confusion & troublesome of trying to understand politics while growing up in the Metis territory. The descriptive painting of a plain that would normally be flooded with Bison, results in real-life struggles throughout the novel. There are many references that resonate with the Canadian lifestyle, which the writer reflects on tremendously. The highlight = The need to return to Indigenous government structures to preserve future generations.

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Sunday (1994) - TV Car Chase

An incredible new discovery. This band relishes a real, indie mood. Much eloquent form in the front-woman. The transition from dinner to her head in the oven, is haunting, and along high hopes for their endless recognition, parts of me wish they remain under the radar so we can sit in this enjoyment forever. My take being, this entire entity somehow pays respect to OJ's Bronco fiasco, but nonetheless, I'm looking forward to more of this brilliance.

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Ode by Charles Simic

The Serbian Pulitzer-winning Poet with tools of dark humour pertaining to his upbringing throughout the War in Yugoslavia. Ode's interpretation can be deemed in various perspectives, yet, one of which highlights the mutual respect of feeling invisible. Simic expresses hope in the light that continues to shine alongside you, even when experiencing doubt. Time Propitious - indicating the probability of success through simple speech. Meaning, you can maintain patience, often a challenge, but there is much to look forward to in the future. For many of us, it's easy to throw in the towel in all the things we're working towards. This poem is a tribute to practicing your inner-zen, and feeling the waves of nostalgia for all the little things that generate happiness within.

hail to the victors

18 September, 2024

Ann Arbor, Michigan

I recently asked a former colleague what they've been up to lately and they responded with, 'I'm evolving.' And I loved this answer. Ours, yours, theirs.. Every industry and area of study has gone through a substantial amount of change over the last few years. It's fascinating. Willing to adapt with the change appears to be one key ingredient to a successful career path. After all, it's my belief that if you truly don't wish to grow with it, you very much might as well pack up. In some sense, there are hundreds of potential applicants lined up ready to go in these confusing times. Sure, we all react to change as it's happening on impulse. But I think most of the time, we don't prepare ourselves enough in advance, on how to change. We all require a certain mindset to be aware of the ongoing advancements and adjustments all around us. Not everyone is capable. Some, more often and prosperous than others.

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The F Word (2013)

An immaculate representation of finding love in the big city. The familiar city. AKA 'What If,' this light, unique romance gives intercepting the girl from another guy in order to escape the friendzone (F as in Friend). Wallace tends to represent the moral majority in most cases here. Proving himself as totally normal, while coming fresh out of the wizarding world, it's uplifting to feel Radcliffe's performance as one of our own. For those who have ever strolled these roads in your prime, this film will really result in a pleasing experience. That, and I really need to input fool's gold into the cookbook.

Ginny Weasley is going to be so upset when she watches this... love is stupid.

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Neil Gaiman's The Ocean at the End of the Lane (2013)

A fantasy to enhance your imagination. Though the story is shadowing these children's epic tale through farmhouses and fields, I very much doubt it was ever intended for kids to read through. Stirring something terribly profound within the reader, as you allow yourself to see the smallest bodies of water as an unimaginable journey. There are some pages of terror, and I think I've faced a few Ursula Monktons in my day. When little, Lettie Hempstock travels to Oz through the ocean and gives you life, she teaches you to grow and try and be worth it ... 'The moon does shine as bright as day.'

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Honey Lung - Sophomore

A melodic anthem and ode to your friends.

Revisiting because the inactivity (as of lately) from this band is crushing me.

I remember hearing this and immediately categorizing it as one of the greatest album openers of all time. Intelligent tone featuring a Pumpkins-inspired solo that emits out a 90's house party subculture. Fingers have never been crossed more tightly. Huge fan, please notice me.

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Tulips by Sylvia Plath

Often defined as a brutal poet, Plath's form of delivery with its trails of depression, carry the reader through the halls of an institute, delivering flowers to this patient. Although the intention of a gift, they're received as dread, yet the only gateway to the outside world (reality). Confessional, which leads this poet to convey extraordinary depth and complexity within her writing. The tulips eat my oxygen can be inscribed on every stone in a graveyard forever & always.

I heard a great quote once; 'Be yourself, don't be Sylvia.'